Talk: Midnight Diaries Entry 3
I wrote this about two weeks after I had finished the second entry. I spent the time trying desperately for closure (finals were coming up); this entry speaks of what happened.
Though this is written in a style commonly reserved for Notes/Verses instead of Entries, I found it more appropriate with the Midnight series because it talks about something real—events that were not imagined or twisted for my stories.
No matter how much you think you’ve moved on, there’s always a small amount of doubt or clinginess. This doubt builds up the longer you try to forget until it finally makes you crazy with indecision—the “love insanity”.
I was not new in finding closure; the first step was to think of everything simply and without emotion, but despite all this, I still could not help but think of her in a loving way.
Wanting so desperately to move on, but at the same time, my heart wanted so desperately wanted to hold on… this paradox is worse than moving on completely or holding on completely because I could not make the decision. I would not know emotional pain nor relief; I would not know anything at all.
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